PETA Headquarters Overwhelmed by Tribbles

Norfolk, Earth – Earlier today, the governor of Virginia declared a state of emergency when the headquarters of the animal rights group PETA was overwhelmed by an invasive species known on the black market as tribbles. According to PETA spokeswoman Elaina Olson, tribbles are “a furry, spherical, sentient ball of joy” that some terrestrial warlords have started to exploit as a cheap source of protein for their frequently-famished troops. Olson explained that PETA has been taking ownership of rescued tribbles for a little over a month now and their numbers seem to be multiplying exponentially. She expressed to our reporter optimistically that “at this rate they should blanket the earth in six months”, before she was drowned out by a wave of purring puffballs.

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